I refused to donate part of my liver to save my birth mother’s life because I felt slighted about her giving me up, but everything changed after an unwanted meeting.
I discovered that I was adopted when I clocked 16 years of age. My birth parents had to give me up because they did not have the means to care for me when I was born.
Months after they delivered me, child services took me, and I ended up with parents who wanted to adopt an infant. My adopted parents are John and Jane, and they love me very much.
I grew up surrounded by three siblings who have made my life wonderful by just being a part of it. As a result, I live a happy life, one I wouldn’t likely have had, had I remained with my birth parents.
One day, out of the blue, my birth parents contacted my adoptive family. My birth mother needed a liver transplant, and though they were on a waitlist, they were afraid that it would be too late. Her situation had rapidly been deteriorating.
They had another child besides me, but they ruled him out because he was still too young. They wanted my parents to test me for compatibility and have me donate a portion of my liver to my birth mom.
John and Jane are very responsible parents, so they decided to consult me before making any decision.
“Hey Scott,” my father said after breaking the news to me. “You can decide to help your parents but your refusal is also acceptable.”
“That’s right honey,” my mom said. “It’s all up to you. We are prepared to support any choice you make.”
I was lost in thought. “You know what kiddo? Why don’t you sleep on it and let us know in the morning?” my father, John, suggested. I agreed, and the next morning I gave them my answer.
“I won’t do it,” I said. “I don’t know them other than they gave birth to me. They have had no part in my life whatsoever and can’t expect me to just make myself available because they suddenly need me.”
My adoptive parents supported my decision and relayed my answer to my birth parents, who were furious with it. The next day, they sent John and Jane a nasty letter.
“We are well within our rights to ask our child to donate his liver. It is not that we need it to eat, we need it to keep his birth mother alive and if he refuses to come to our aid, we can seek legal action which would result in him doing it by force. We would like to avoid such a scenario so we hope you can convince him to reconsider his decision.”
When John and Jane read the letter, they were furious. “Who are they to make such demands?” my mother asked.
“How did they even track us down?” my father wondered angrily. “It was a closed adoption so all the details should be confidential.”
I was also furious at the audacity of my parents. They simply could not expect me to feel beholden to a family I’ve not been a part of for over a decade.
A few days later, my biological father, Steve, came to see me. Again it shocked my parents that he could so easily track us down. John wanted to have at him, but Jane calmed him down.
“Honey, he came all the way,” she said. “Let’s at least hear him out.”
My father eventually agreed, after which I was summoned. I refused to leave my room to speak to him, so Jane had to come up to convince me.
“Just listen to what he has to say and we can kick him out afterwards,” she assured me.
I obliged her because I could never refuse her out of the love I had for her. Jane had put a lot into raising me and, unlike my birth parents, put a lot of effort into making me feel wanted.
When I saw Steve, I was stunned by our resemblance. It took the wind out of my sails, and I just stared at him as he talked. Finally, he convinced me to return home with him for a visit he said would change my mind.
I was very certain nothing could, but I agreed anyway, and he took me to their house. The first thing I saw upon entering was a one-year-old child who Steve identified as my brother.
I looked at him and realized that his future was riding on my decision. If I refused, the little boy would lose his mother, which would be terrible.
I was still very angry at my birth parents, but I agreed to help them so my little brother could grow up with parents.
After a successful operation, I asked my birth parents not to contact me again. They respected my wishes, and I am glad that another child will have a happy childhood in a complete family.
What did we learn from this story?
Don’t repay evil with evil. Scott wanted to ignore his birth parents’ plea for help, and he would have had he not seen his younger brother, who would grow up without a mother. It changed his mind and made him look past his anger to save his birth mother.
Never make decisions in anger. Scott was angry when he refused to help his parents. He did not like the fact that they gave him up, and if he had let that anger consume him, his birth mom would have died, and his younger brother would have had to grow up without knowing the touch of a loving mother.
Thankfully, he made the right decision in the end.
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