The Man I’m Dating Now Was The Doctor Who Was Supposed To Do D&C For Me

We were not ready to have a child so when I realized that I was pregnant, I decided to abort it before telling him. I knew he was going to tell me exactly what I was thinking so I made up my mind to do it even before I told him. If I had money on me, I would have gone ahead and done it without telling him. I wasn’t working. I was just an SHS graduate looking around for something to do while waiting for my results. I called him, “Ben, all is not well with me here. I tested yesterday and I was positive. We need to act fast before it gets out of hand or before eyes start to see it. You know my mom, she’s very good at identifying pregnancy, even a day-old pregnancy, so please let’s act fast.”


Maybe it was the desperation in my voice or I said something that made him doubt me. At first, he said I was lying. I told him, “How can I joke with such a thing?” He said I wanted money and I was using clever means to get it. I told him, “I’ve been with you for three years. Have I ever asked for money from you? When you give me, I take, when you don’t, I still stay with you so what are you talking about?” I went to his house to show him the test kit. He said, “But this proves nothing. It could be that you picked it from the garbage and you’re trying to blackmail me with it.” I was getting angry. His doubt got me frustrated so I started screaming at him, “You think this is a joke? What should I tell you again for you to believe me?”

That day he made me sleep over so I could do the test again in front of him. He slept with me that night. I didn’t want to but when I said no, he forced his way through me. In the morning, we did the test and I was positive. I said, “Now what? Or you don’t believe the test kit too?” He told me, “Go home and come this evening. I will give you the money to go and do it.” I went back in the evening, I didn’t see him. I called his phone but he didn’t pick up. For three consecutive days, he played hide and seek with me. When I finally pinned him down he told me, “I’m not responsible for the pregnancy so I’m not going to give you anything. If you like, give birth. We’ll do a paternity test and it will prove that I’m not the father.”

My spirit left my body. I had never known any man apart from him. I was nineteen when he found me. I’d been nothing but truthful to him. I’d had men coming my way with good money and promises but I turned my back on them because of him. I screamed, “What do you mean? What are you trying to tell me? If you’re not the one then who is?” He said calmly, “I’ve done the maths. It doesn’t match so look for the person who is responsible.

”


He had nothing to lose and people who have nothing to lose have one behaviour; They don’t care. I was the one waiting to go to the University. I was the one who had all her future ahead of her. I was the one with dreams and aspirations to become something in future. He was already a grown man who had settled into his job and had nothing more to dream about. I left his house in tears and with a heart that was melting in my chest. I looked back and told him, “You’ll answer to God one day, mark it on the wall. You know what? I would have taken your challenge and given birth to prove to you that you’re indeed the father but from the way you’ve acted towards me in these few days, I won’t be proud to have a child whose father is you.”

I didn’t have any plan B but to take it off my tummy. I spoke to friends who put money together and even escorted me to the hospital. The nurse dressed me up and put me on the table. She said, “The doctor will be with you shortly.” When the doctor entered and he saw my face, he asked me, “Madam, how old are you?”

“I’m twenty-five (I lied. I was 22 years old.)

“Is that your first time?”

“Yes please.”

“Did you come with someone?”

“Yes, my friends. They are out there waiting for me.”

“But why are you doing this? Are you scared of something?”

“I want to go to school. I can’t take care of it. The father denied responsibility.”

He went quiet for a while and said, “If I tell you to give birth for a rich couple who will pay you huge sums of money, will you do it?” I was stunned. “What is this man talking about? Will he do it and let me go in peace?” I answered, “No, I don’t want to carry it. I want to go back to school.” He asked me to get up and dress up. He took me to his office and spoke to me for over an hour. He even made a man call me. A man who said he would take care of me until I give birth and then give me a huge sum of money that will take care of my education and also take care of the future. “I will take the baby away as soon as you give birth and you won’t even have to remember you have a baby,” he told me. The doctor asked me, “So what do you say? I can speak to your parents on your behalf if you let me.”

I went quiet for a while. I was thinking about the excuse to give to escape the trap he was setting for me. I asked him, “Can I think about it?” He smiled broadly and said, “That’s where I want the conversation to go. You need time to think about it and I trust you’ll make a good decision.” I left the hospital with my friends. When they asked if I did it I told them, “The doctor said he won’t do it for me so let’s look for another doctor who can help.”

That same day, we visited another hospital and got it done. I was in pain throughout the day. My mom was worried but I couldn’t tell her what the issue was. In the evening the doctor called me. He said, “It could be that you’ll have only one child. Don’t throw it away. Maybe you don’t want it but use it to bless others who are desperately looking for what you want to throw away.” I said, “Give me some days. I’m thinking about it.” From that day, I didn’t pick up his calls again. He even called with a different line. He gave my number to the rich man to also try but I brushed both of them aside and continued living my life as if nothing has happened.

In 2016, I got admission to the university. I invested my pain and disappointment into my studies. I didn’t even have the time to look at another man. I was scared of them. Once bitten, to me, was more than twice shy. That aside, I knew school was the only thing that could get me to my dreams. In our fourth year, the women’s commission of the school organized a program for women and I attended. There was a man on the stage talking. He looked like someone I knew but I couldn’t figure out where. I listened to him absentmindedly while trying to figure him out. By the time he ended his speech and everyone was clapping, a light flickered in my mind. I said, “Yes! that’s the doctor.” I was sitting in front so I was doing everything to escape his attention.

It was too late. While I was trying to figure him out, he had already figured me out and was making the move to approach me. He tapped me from behind and I turned. He smiled. “Do you remember me?” I smiled back while shaking my head. He said, “It’s obvious you won’t. Let me remind you.” I followed him to his car while he was trying hard to tell me what I already knew. I said, “Oh wow, such a small world.” He asked why I didn’t pick up his calls again and asked if I had the baby.” I told him the truth, “I had it that very day in a different hospital. I couldn’t have it any other way.” His face dropped. He said, “You’ve done well for yourself, that’s the most important thing.”

We started talking again before Covid hit. He disappeared because he was very busy but once in a while he’ll reappear and tell me, “Stay alive. I want to see you in one piece when this is all over.” Then he’ll disappear again. When Ghana’s cases started dropping consistently, he called and said, “It looks like what we are doing is working, let’s celebrate it.”

I went out with him for the first time and that very day he proposed to me. I wasn’t shocked. I saw it coming. That was the only thing that explained his constant checking up on me. I asked questions. Questions like, “So where you found me doesn’t matter to you at all?” He answered, “I see a lot of people on that table every day. They are not bad people. Some made bad decisions and they came to correct them. It’s over. You’ve gone ahead to complete school. You’re here and I’m here. That’s all that matters.

I asked him about the rich man and his desire for a child. He told me he couldn’t get anyone to do it s he stopped asking. I felt sad for him. All of a sudden I started wishing I did it for him. I threw what he needed desperately away and it made me feel like an unrepentant sinner.

We’ve been dating since December 2021. He doesn’t remind me of my past nor disrespects me because of my past. He treats me like a partner, his missing ribs. I came from his ribs so I could stand next to him, he told me. Everything he does points to the fact that we are getting married. I’m happy about that prospect but that happiness comes with a constant voice of fear, especially when I remember what he told me on that day when he called; “It could be that you will have only one child. Don’t throw it away…” What if we get married and I don’t give birth? His words would be true and he’ll judge me for it, right?” It’s this doubt that’s casting gloom on my sunny day.

Someday I want to talk to him about it and ask the ‘what if’ questions but I’m reminded that I should let bygone be bygone so I don’t talk about it. I’m only praying that we don’t meet any obstacles on the way. That will kill my soul and render my night sky starless. Now, I wish I listened to him but, that train is long gone and all there’s now is regret and fear.