I’m a 15-year-old person who is transgender, which means I’m a guy even though I was assigned female at birth . I’m having a tough time with one of my younger siblings who is 12 years old and doesn’t identify as just a boy or a girl . When we were little, we were very close, but recently we’ve been growing apart and my sibling is having a hard time dealing with it. They have trouble controlling their anger, which is linked to their specific type of autism.
In the past, I’ve usually been the one they direct their anger at. I’ve been okay with this because I thought it was better for them to let out their frustration on me instead of others. But there are some new problems now. We have a little sister who is 5 years old, and my sibling has also been yelling at her. Whenever I’m around, I try to stop it, but I can’t always be there. Because of this, their relationship with our little sister has become strained. I’m worried that our little sister might start thinking it’s okay to behave like this too.
As we’re both getting older, my sibling’s angry outbursts are becoming a bigger concern, especially when we’re in public places. I understand that my sibling’s autism can make it difficult for them to control their reactions, but it’s important to behave appropriately in public. We both look older than we actually are, and where we live, saying hurtful things to others can lead to serious trouble with the law.
Recently, things got worse during a walk we took together with our little sister. They got into an argument and my sibling broke something in their anger. I tried to calm things down, but I got frustrated myself. I ended up saying something mean that I now regret. My sibling’s behavior was getting worse, and I felt embarrassed because other people were around.
At one point, my younger sister mentioned that a necklace my sibling was wearing was reflecting the sun into their eyes. My sibling got upset and threw the necklace away. This hurt me because the necklace was special. In response, they said something really hurtful, questioning where their caring sibling had gone and why I was acting so differently.
I got upset and told them how I felt. I left with my younger sister because I was close to crying and I didn’t want to make things worse. Later, I talked to our mom about what happened. We had a family meeting to talk about everything. I’m still shocked and hurt by what my sibling said. I feel like they betrayed our relationship. I’m also worried that what they said could be considered a serious problem in the place where we live.
I’m looking for advice on how to handle this situation better. Our parents are trying to help, but it’s not easy for them either. I don’t blame them – they’re doing their best to support us.
