Pamela was shocked when she found out that the man she had loved and was about to walk down the aisle with was a total stranger. He was not what she thought she was. He had told her he was a manager in a club whereas he was a gigolo – he serviced older women for money, and even had young guys in the business who worked for him. It was a well-organised business of satisfying the sexual taste of rich older women who preferred to pay young energetic men for momentary romance.
She knew her man would be every woman’s man because of his handsome features but she never knew he was a gigolo, a master of the game.
Disappointed Pamela, who believed there were more illegitimate work her man was involved and not ready to stop, decided to call off her wedding to save herself from future heartbreaks.
“Many thought I was crazy when I called off my wedding five weeks before the wedding day. I had tirelessly built my relationship to that point. I earned more than him, but that was not an issue. I loved him so much that I was blinded by it. There were so many things he did that pointed clearly that he was not real.
“He doesn’t allow me to come close to his phone, and most calls he made were strange. He preferred to hide whenever he made such calls. No matter how I tried to listen I could never hear the conversation. He was a handsome man, with macho features. I always felt insecure around him. I was always afraid another woman would snatch him from me. So, whenever he made such calls I would think he was talking to another girl. He would tell me and even swore that he was not seeing another girl.
“He told me he was a club manager but he never allowed me to visit his club. He told me too that he was into forex trading and real estate business. He lied that he had lands he acquired around Ajah area in Lagos. All these I found out were lies.
“I found out he was dating married women, big society ladies. Not one or two but many, and he was at their service. He had other young guys working for him. The club where he claimed to be a manager was the same place he used for his illicit activities.
“It started when my guy warned me not to tag him or post our pre-wedding pictures on social media. Even our wedding invitation card. He said he didn’t want it to go public. I became curious. I posted all our pictures on all my social media handles and tagged him. That was how the bubble busted.
“I started receiving threats to back off from the marriage. I received videos and pictures of him with those women he serviced for money. Some of them even took him to different countries.
“My pain was that he was not even remorseful about it and not ready to stop. He told me that that was what he did for a living and was not ready to stop. It was either I accepted him that way or left him. I had no other choice than to walk away.
“Both parents were not happy about it because money had been spent already. We had booked for a hall, caterers, and even ‘aso ebi’ bought and shared.
“I am still in pain.”
Dear Pamela, I hope you are not expecting me to scold you. Girl, your courage is impeccable; it takes a lot of courage and guts to take such a bold step. Many women would have continued with the marriage to avoid being trolled, or shamed. Now, you need to be strong and avoid negative people who may want to remind you or blame you for your actions. Try to do things that make you happy, and always remember you made the right decision – you chose yourself above all, and that is what matters. This, too, will pass away.
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